Boxes

When I was about 12 or 13 I remember watching TV with my Dad and he turned on a show that featured some dude pulling a string out of his stomach and twenty minutes later he was gravitating in the middle of the street and all the boys on the stoop were blown away.  It was David Blaine before he started doing things like trying to set world records for publicity.  At one point I remember one of my Junior High Friends asking me is I thought Blaine was the Anti-Christ, I was concerned at the time, then I realized the Anti-Christ would probably have better things to do than impress girl scouts with his ability to find their card.

One of the dumbest things Blaine every did was try to live in a box suspended over England's River Thames for 44 days surviving on merely 4.5 liters of water per day.  Incredible? Yes.  Stupid? Yes.

Since Sarah and I switched to a single income we sold my truck since we weren't going to be able to afford to have two cars.  It was an easy decision for us, and truthfully it hasn't been too difficult, we just have to plan our day better.

But because we have one car, Sarah takes the car to work during the week which leaves me and the boys at home.  At times it makes me feel like I am suspended in a box over England.  The furthest I can go is immediately related to the maximum distance the boys can travel without melting down or about 300 feet.

Obviously I love our house and where we live but not having the ability to do something as simple as run errands wears on the psychy.  So here we sit on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays playing in the back yard, cooking food all day, coloring at the table, and trying to get my oldest son to stay in bed during nap time.

Is it the same as living in a box?  No, it is smarter.  But there are times it absolutely feels isolating, especially when our roles feel like they have been flip flopped. Sarah was made to be a mom, to love and nurture and care for those that used to live inside of her.  I feel like I was meant to make money for our family and support us in that capacity.

Needless to say we are still trying to figure out how this year is going to work.  We will do it to the best of our capacity and eventually I am sure we will get back to where we are most comfortable but until then it is walks to the corner and back for the boys and me.

Is there anything about your daily life that makes you feel like you are an illusionist trying to stay in the spotlight a bit longer by being locked in a box?

Crap Apps

I am a big fan of all things i. I got an iPhone as soon as I could afford one and a Mac before I needed to replace my old computer. I wasn't originally an Apple person, I thought Steve Jobs was creepy in a college guy going to a high school party kind of way. I thought he was trying to show me how to be awesome without in fact being awesome. I don't trust anyone whose neck I can't see, it is just my standard rule.

All that being said, I always have my phone on me, always. Today I wanted to let you in on some of my least favorite apps. I get sick of the apps that people hock all over the internet telling people how awesome Evernote is and how Facebook is now more accessible than ever so today, just the Crap Apps that for some reason are still on my phone.

Compass: I believe this was rolled out in the release of the 3Gs, I was excited to see it and play with it and obviously go exploring with it to find buried treasure. This is the biggest waste of space on my phone, I have literally never used it and Steve refuses to let me delete it off my phone. Good call turtleneck, force me to keep apps that I will never open, Voice Notes falls into the same, I will never ever use you, category.

Magic Piano: As much as I enjoy playing 'The House of the Rising Sun' on my phone over and over again because it is one of the only free songs on this App, it stays in my Entertainment folder and gets opened once every 3 months. It is another incredible app put out by Smule that I never use. It allows me to pretend to play piano without actually pressing any keys but merely tapping my screen over and over and over. I get bored faster than Tim Lincecum pitching to the Dodgers.

Dragon Dictation: I love the concept of this app, speak into it, it writes down what you say, awesome right? Yeah, as awesome as he Dodgers winning a World Series. Here's the problem, it takes longer to speak into the phone, correct the mistakes, and then send your message than it would to just text the message in the first place. It's a great idea, but until it gets a bit further down the developmental freeway, it will sit in my Productivity folder feeding me empty promises about how great it is .

I have a ton of apps that I use and love on a regular basis, Twitter, MLB At Bat '11, Blogger, Zombie Freeway, ZOMBIE FREEWAY. You have an iPhone or Droid? Awesome, whats your Crap App on it? Don't have a smart phone? Congrats, what technology do you have that is a total waste of it existing?

I'm a Student of My Work

I have been a part time stay at home dad now for about a month and I decided that it is time to let you all know about some of the best things I have learned since staying at home.

1. My wife is way better at staying home than me- I needed to get that out of the way because since being at home I can finally appreciate the work she has put in with our boys by staying at home.  I am more tired at the end of a stay at home day than I am after work.

2. You have to feed your kids 3 meals a day- Granted I knew that, but I am pretty sure I am cooking for 16 hours a day right now.  And it isn't just cooking one meal that the boys and I can sit down and eat together, it is differentiating meals for my 1 year old, 2 year old, and myself and frankly... I'm a picky eater.

3. Tangled is the best thing on Netflix- I am pretty sure I have seen different parts of this movie about 100 times, my kids still aren't tired of it, nor am I.  Flynn Rider is my hero, mostly because his facial hair mimics my own, a patch on the chin and nothing else.  It is about time we get rid of this idea that manliness comes with a full beard, I am starting to equate manhood with a smallish patch of hair on the bottom of people's faces, right now.

4.  Cooper loves his brother to the point of pain- 99% of the crying that happens in this house is due to Cooper trying to hug his brother, or move his brother, or tackle his brother.  Trying to explain to a two year old that he can dominate his little brother and he needs to be careful is like explaining to a horse that I am terrified to get on his back.  It doesn't register, and now matter how much I talk someone is still going to get hurt.

5.  White floors are not conducive to raising children- Really? Who installs white laminate anywhere? Thanks landlords for making me clean my floors hourly.

6. Deadbolts are non-negotiable- Coop has a desire to sneak outside any chance he gets, he is like David Copperfield without the terrible wardrobe, bad hair, and womanizing ways.  He can reach the knobs now but the deadbolt is still out of reach, gotta keep 'em locked, always.

Yup, six things I have learned since staying at home, mostly common sense, but to a man who has to live it to appreciate it, some of these have blown my mind.

Stay at home moms and dads, what is the funniest thing you have learned since being at home?

Sunday Video of the Week

This is from Tripp and Tyler over at TrippandTyler.tv All of their videos are incredible but I was a big fan of this little guy.  Enjoy!

Focus IV and My Waistline

I turned 25 and my metabolism broke, at least that is what I have told myself as an excuse as well as a reassurance of the possibility that it may indeed fix itself. In this whole idea of focus I haven't talked much about my focus, but I did tell you briefly that my declining health had reached critical mass as had my waistline. 

Now I know some of you are thinking, "Peter, don't be ridiculous you are the very definition of man," and for that I thank you, but I have also begun to realize that I am not 17 anymore and I don't burn 1,000 calories a day swimming in a speedo (you're welcome for that mental image). I have also realized that there is this crazy thing called metabolism that God created to keep us honest about the foods we ingest and about the same time we are forced to pay taxes he slows this thing down, way down. I don't listen to country music much anymore, but it reminds me of the line in Trace Adkins song "Hot Mama" that says, "you want that body back you had at 17." So in case you were wondering, yes, I want to be a hot mama.

In my study about focus this little diddy came up in 1 Corinthians 9:27, "but I discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified."

Dangit.

This idea of remaining healthy and staying fit has always been something that was in the back of my mind even when I could wear a size 30 speedo and my man thighs didn't rip the bottom seam of my suit. I knew my whole life I was going to have to be aware of my weight when I got older because my Dad struggled with his weight as he aged.

About 5 weeks ago I hit a weight that I never wanted to be and beyond that a waist size I can barely count to. I decided something needed to change, I needed to focus. I needed to make my body a slave to the discipline that not only are we called to as Christians but also to my commitment to be on this earth as long as I can for the furthering of the message of Christ and for the well-being of my family (yes, they are better off with me here, at least at this point in our lives).

This focus hasn't been easy and as I write this we are having some friends and family come over to eat pizza and hang out with babies. A perfect night as long as I don't give in to the temptation of blurring my focus. The fact is that it is easier to blur your eyes when they are in focus than to try and focus them when you need glasses.

Focus needs to remain at the forefront of my thoughts, the verse that has torn my to shreds is 1 Corinthians 3:13-14 (which I talk about in my first post) and in that passage the term "strain forward" shows up. In order to focus I have to strain forward, and that word strain conjures up feelings of pain and constancy, which is what we have to endure in order to focus. At times we need to endure pain and we always must remain constant lest we fall back into our old habits.

So my weight is not yet under control but I have remained focused in my pursuit to get it there. In other words I have 5 weeks down and about my whole life to go. Focus, it isn't always easy, but my straining forward will allow me to reach my desired goal.

What goals do you have that you need to strain for? What areas of your life do you need to discipline? How big is your waist line? (Just kidding).

Have a good weekend all.

Focus III on Poop

When I was being potty trained it was really easy for me, so easy that I don't even remember it, which means it couldn't have been that insurmountable of an obstacle.  I must have been drawn to the porcelain naturally, consequently, I still am, hmm.  

Cooper has been in the midst of potty training for the last twoish weeks and he has been a champ when it comes to onesies (the act peeing in the toilet, not the popular baby clothing).  He even sleeps through his naps and the night without wetting the bed, pretty awesome.  Twosies thus far have been an issue though.  By issue I mean he went numero dos in his underwear and as I was cleaning that up he squatted again and pooped on the floor, while 4 of my best friends were chatting with me on Google+, awesome.


I started thinking about the change that Cooper is trying to make.  For two and a half years this kid has done his business in what he was wearing and continued on his way as if nothing were wrong, because in his mind, there wasn't.  Now he is at a point where he has to change his entire way of thinking.  It isn't just the act of going to the bathroom in the toilet, it is the act of recognizing that what he is doing is no longer acceptable and he needs to change that habit.


I read this verse this morning and the thought of focusing has ripped me to pieces lately:


"Romans 8:5
For those who are according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who are according to the Spirit, the things of the Spirit."


When we focus it isn't just that we need to know what we are doing and the direction we are headed, but we need to make sure our thinking is changing from the flesh to the Spirit.  We need to make sure our focus is on the Spirit and what He has for us, not what we wish we had ourselves.


That's when I thought about the change Cooper is making into self-sufficiency, and obviously we have a ways to go before we can wash our hands of helping him in the bathroom or even dressing him for that matter, but he is on his way to  life change because he is recognizing that the old way of doing things is no longer okay, their is a new better way to do his business.


We need to focus on the new, better way of doing our business, focusing our minds and our sights on the Spirit, not on the flesh.


What is something you have had trouble focusing on because it was difficult to attain?


Mine is staying in decent shape.  We will talk about that tomorrow.

Micah Turned One

We had Micah boy's first birthday party here about a month ago and Sarah was a champ and did just about everything herself.  With some great last minute help from my Mom, her husband Loyd and Sarah's parents the party was great.  I thought I would share a few pictures from the festivities which was an All-American Baseball theme.

Papa Loyd

Juniper, Cooper, and my cousin Becky 

Sarah's best friend Lissa Sander

My friends Denver and Corey (Lissa's husband)

Sarah's Mom Susan 

My favorite moment when Sarah's grandpa Dick tried to give Micah some of his Dr. Pepper

Ryan (Sarah's Brother) Brad (Sarah's Dad) and Bergie (Sarah's Grandpa)

 It was a great party overall and Sarah was a champ completing this party after her first week back to school in a new grade.  We love our Micah boy and feel so blessed by those who are a part of his life both near and far away.

Focus II

I have been trying to lose weight recently, I am not doing P90X, or drinking green tea, mostly because I can't afford either, I am merely eating better and exercising.  About a week into this whole weight loss thing I went on a run and I got a sharp pain on the inside of my left leg, slightly above my ankle.  I ignored it and kept running, I figured it would go away like spider bites and feathered hair.  The next day I went out to run again and the same thing happened except the pain was more severe and started to hurt with each step I took.

So I went to my doctor, Doctor Internet, and she told me (Yes, the internet is a girl) I had a stress fracture in my leg, usually brought on by excessive running after long periods of fat.  I didn't want to give up on my diet but running is the way I have always slimmed down when I wasn't feeling comfortable and this stress fracture was knocking me out of running for 6-8 weeks.

I had to figure something out, because with the holiday season coming up I needed to lose weight so I could put it back on and continue the vicious cycle.  I decided I had to eat waaaaay better, that cheese was  not a food group, and that the weight set in my garage was going to be put to good use.  So I'm three weeks in and have been pretty successful thus far, but I had to focus on my goal in order to achieve success.

The idea of focus has been plaguing me (I am always scared I am going to misspell plaguing and make it plaquing and then the whole world will think I have bad teeth). Focus is a funny thing because you don't realize you are out of whack until you are squinting to see the score of the game, or asking your wife to read the back of the cereal box to you.

Focus, like a lot of things is something you don't miss until it is gone.  It begs the question, "how, then, do I get focused?"  For me, I am a "type A" personality when it comes to my expectations of others and a "type B" when it comes to others expectations of me, that may just mean I am a jerk, but I do indeed expect a lot out of myself.

I can't accomplish much, however, unless I feel like my private life is in order, this can be anything from, I forgot to do the dishes that I told Sarah I would take care of to lingering sin issues in my life.  Unless I clear up the junk that is hindering me from straining forward, then I become distracted.

So, how do I focus? I clear out the junk and strain forward, with my eye on the prize.  That and have a strong cup of coffee before, during, and after work.

How do you focus?

Focus

I spoke at Immanuel High School's Chapel today.  It got me thinking about the message that i deliver on a regular basis and whether or not what I say on stage changes depending on the way I want to be perceived.  When I got to IHS and speak I am at a venue of about 300 people where 99 percent of the students profess a love of Christ.  Awesome, that being said, I want to make sure that I am both challenging and light hearted, which should probably be my goal for every talk, however, when I go to speak at special venues I try to put my best foot forward, there is something about a strange place with hundreds of people that stirs me to try and be better than I am.  

I work harder on my talk I cross reference more, I practice before I deliver it, etc.  

My question is this, why not put forth that effort all the time?

How much better could I represent the gospel by developing the abilities that God has given me and honing them to a place of excellence?  On Sunday Nights am I pouring over scripture to see the entirety of the meaning God has for us?  Am I practicing my delivery before I get on stage? Or am I letting myself be stagnant and settling for mediocre?  

The pursuit of excellence starts with movement in one direction, towards a goal, a fixed point.  We need to start that pursuit.

We have all been there, realizing our potential is sitting with us on the coach watching "The Wizard" and dreaming about owning the Nintendo 'PowerGlove' because, "It is bad!"

Lets move our potential off the coach and start to channel it into the things we want to do, the things God has gifted us with the ability to do.  Let's (Wo)Man up.

Slowin'

My Monday, Wednesday, and Friday

Life change is crazy.  Since Sarah and I have been married there hasn't been a single year where we have had the same combination of jobs or the same number of occupants twice in a row.  Since we got married one thing has remained the same, I have always been employed full-time.  Cooper was born, I still got eight hours to myself during the day, Micah was born, same thing, we moved, I got eight hours of freedom from the madness of unpacking.  I always had an outlet at work to be able to sideline my thoughts and just do the work that I felt called to do.

Then last November happened, I came to a point in my life where I had to make a decision, I need to continue my education and it was going to be in either Seminary or in teaching.  After a ton of prayer and seeking the counsel of some of the people I trust the most in my life I decided that God was leading me away from full-time ministry.  Since then I have almost completed my Single Subject Credential for English, and am now working part time at Selma FBC as the High School Pastor.

In the past when things changed it was all about life speeding up, an addition to the family, an opportunity to speak somewhere, a new house, fixing a new house, selling a new house, etc. but this time the change is about slowing down, and it is one of the hardest adjustments I have ever had to make. I check Twitter about 70 times a day in between making meals for my kids and doing the laundry... again.  Slow is hard for me, especially when my wife is working but her heart is to be at home with her boys and I love my boys but I wasn't made to nurture them the way Sarah does, so I would prefer to work as she stayed home.  It makes it even harder.

I know as a Pastor I am supposed to have this whole, "be still and know that I am God," thing down, but I don't, not even close.  I have been forced to slow down, forced to wake up at 6 am when my boys do and have nothing to do but take care of them (which is huge job in itself) all day long.  I have no where to go because Sarah has the only car, it is too hot for the park right now, and I am not taking my kids to any play dates because that'd be awkward for me and the other guardian who I guarantee is female (you know they are female because a man wouldn't call it a play date, they would call it tackle football).

Regardless, God is teaching me to slow down and to remember what is most important in my life.  I have to go and save Cooper from a scary lion that doesn't exist.