80's Worship

You know that one time that God is awesome?  By awesome I mean it in the same way that Rich Mullins explained it in his hit song in 1988, "When He rolls up His sleeves He ain't just putting on the ritz, our God is an awesome God," I think it is more meaningful that way.

Regardless, His rolled up sleeves have been evident to me lately in the answering of prayer.  I won't go deep into specifics, but I have a friend who has been in the process of getting a job for several months now.  After multiple interviews and red tape he got a call saying he got the job. 

Pretty awesome, and He wasn't just putting on the ritz.

I know this isn't a life or death situation, and I know a lot of people have to worry about worse things than landing a good job, but I am also keenly aware that we matter to God.  Our hopes and fear, desires and purpose were uniquely crafted for each and every one of us by Him, so why is it that He wouldn't care? 

There are indeed times when I know God is not going to say yes to my prayer and other times when he will just ignore them all together.

Prayer closes doors as well.  Sometimes we get so excited about an opportunity only to have a door slammed on our face, thats okay.  Hard, but okay.

Regardless He has thunder in His footsteps and lightning in His fists, our God is an awesome God.

What'd I Just Say?

As I was walking into church this morning with my wife and two kids we ran into our good friends the Silvas.  They have been parents now for about 5 months and are very much into the swing of parenthood.  I know this because as we approached the church Denver asked his wife if she remembered the 'Horsey.'  He was referencing the unicornesque stuffed animal that is one of their kid's favorite toys, but hearing a man as rugged as Denver watering down a word to make it more kid friendly made me laugh a bit and simultaneously lose respect for him as a man.  I started thinking about all of the hits my manhood has taken by the change in language that occurred when a kid popped out of my wife.  Here are a few words that I never would have said as bachelor but now are in my everyday vocabulary:

1. Cute- Sounds innocent enough right?  Wrong.  I can feel the testosterone leaving my body any time I say, "Sarah, Micah looks so cute in that sweater vest and button up shirt outfit today."  It is like that word is the thorn and manliness is the inflatable raft you bought this summer at Walgreens for 7.99, if they ever touch, it is gone forever.   Sounds innocent, and that is the problem, it sounds innocent.

2.  Y, EY, IE, S- These are suffixes that have the power to emasculate any word within a five mile radius.   Even gross words are disarmed by these suffixes, poopy, toots, tinkles, etc.  If you utter words with these suffixes it is quite possible your facial hair will fall out and you will start smelling better immediately.  At first it sounds like a good trade off, all you have to do is add a Y to the end of a word and you don't have to shave anymore, sweet.  You are wrong though, who is the last man you respected without any facial hair that isn't me?  Thats what I thought, none men, and my grammar is incorrect because it made me feel more good about I as a manly.

3.  Potty- Being in the midst of potty training with Cooper I say this word hundreds of times a day, in fact the most commonly heard phrase in our house right now is, "Cooper, do you have to go tinkles on the potty?"  Really!? A twenty year old version of myself would have beat me up for saying anything even remotely close to that.

4.  Paci  (Pass-ee)- Is in Pacifier shortened.  This is a word that I thought was a good compromise at first because I wasn't going to be caught dead saying "binky."  It doesn't matter if it is binky, paci, or meemer, they all sound like sound effects for a terrible action movie.  You know how Chuck Norris is going to die? I do.  He is going to say the word 'paci' and roundhouse kick himself in the mouth for saying it.

5.  Bah-bah- As in bottle.  Bah-bah isn't bad, for a one year old they can say it and they know what you are referring to so it isn't so much baby talk for the sake of baby talk but rather for the sake of communication, it is his evil twin brother with a creepstache that stays home online talking to hot chicks that I have an issues with, bah-bahs.  It is an abbreviation of the actual word combined with the emasculating suffix of 'S' that causes this word to be so disarming to manhood that if uttered you are forced to buy an American-Girl doll and take it with you everywhere.  It is a terrible occurrence but I have seen it happen, twice.

In reality I don't have beef with any of these words as I use them on a regular basis but still enjoy watching baseball even if I don't understand the rules or chatting over a warm cup of coffee cuddled in a soft blanket with my BFF. Crap.

Moms and Dads, what are some words that entered into your home when a baby did?  I really am interested to hear these, please leave your comments below.  Happy Monday.

Musings on the Week

Since I am at home a lot now I don't get a chance to talk with adults as much as I used to, because of that I have a lot of thoughts run through my head that I don't get to talk about to people over three feet tall.  That being said, here are my thoughts throughout the week:

1.  I drank more coffee than I should have this week, I believe it is related to getting less sleep than I should have but I am not confident in that assessment, I will let you know when my children wake me up at 5:30 tomorrow.

2.  Complaining about Facebook on Facebook is like complaining about animal rights while cooking a     t-bone.  Don't like it? Switch to Tofu.  Don't like tofu?  Good, Ron Swanson would be proud of you.  Don't know who Ron Swanson is?  That means you spend too much time watching Meredith Grey sulk and not enough time laughing your head off.  Don't know who Meredith Grey is? Congrats on being the .5% of our population who is living their own adventure rather than watching someone else's.
(Note: I am not part of that .5%)

3.  Mark Zuckerberg is every bit as awkward as me my Sophomore year. (I was a late bloomer, you want to fight?)

4.  Don't fret if your kid isn't reaching benchmarks before all of their punk friends, with their dry underwear and their ability to remember the number 15 when counting to 20, God made them perfect and they will hit their benchmarks when they are ready and God has planned.

5.  When potty training sometimes you just have to throw underwear away.

6.  When your kid is potty training sometimes you just have to throw underwear away.

7.  A well timed poop joke is the best fodder for comedy.

8.  Audiobooks are great as long as you want to listen to the same person talk for five hours straight without remembering a word of what they said.

What are some of your random thoughts throughout the week?  What about Facebook's announcements or the Dodger fans that finally have something to cheer about (the inevitable collapse of my favorite team, the Giants)?  Have a good Friday, I hope as you read this I am asleep or drinking my third cup of coffee.

Boxes

When I was about 12 or 13 I remember watching TV with my Dad and he turned on a show that featured some dude pulling a string out of his stomach and twenty minutes later he was gravitating in the middle of the street and all the boys on the stoop were blown away.  It was David Blaine before he started doing things like trying to set world records for publicity.  At one point I remember one of my Junior High Friends asking me is I thought Blaine was the Anti-Christ, I was concerned at the time, then I realized the Anti-Christ would probably have better things to do than impress girl scouts with his ability to find their card.

One of the dumbest things Blaine every did was try to live in a box suspended over England's River Thames for 44 days surviving on merely 4.5 liters of water per day.  Incredible? Yes.  Stupid? Yes.

Since Sarah and I switched to a single income we sold my truck since we weren't going to be able to afford to have two cars.  It was an easy decision for us, and truthfully it hasn't been too difficult, we just have to plan our day better.

But because we have one car, Sarah takes the car to work during the week which leaves me and the boys at home.  At times it makes me feel like I am suspended in a box over England.  The furthest I can go is immediately related to the maximum distance the boys can travel without melting down or about 300 feet.

Obviously I love our house and where we live but not having the ability to do something as simple as run errands wears on the psychy.  So here we sit on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays playing in the back yard, cooking food all day, coloring at the table, and trying to get my oldest son to stay in bed during nap time.

Is it the same as living in a box?  No, it is smarter.  But there are times it absolutely feels isolating, especially when our roles feel like they have been flip flopped. Sarah was made to be a mom, to love and nurture and care for those that used to live inside of her.  I feel like I was meant to make money for our family and support us in that capacity.

Needless to say we are still trying to figure out how this year is going to work.  We will do it to the best of our capacity and eventually I am sure we will get back to where we are most comfortable but until then it is walks to the corner and back for the boys and me.

Is there anything about your daily life that makes you feel like you are an illusionist trying to stay in the spotlight a bit longer by being locked in a box?

Staying Regular

Aound the Anderson home routines are very important, mostly because if I don't have a routine established I will most likely be as productive as the road workers who have been causing my 10 minute commute to be a 12 minute one.  Needless to say most of the routines we have established are based around the boys and their need for regularity (both their schedule and their bowels).

Cooper has now established his own routine though, it is about as cute as a routine can be, and be cute I mean rugged in a future lumberjack with lots of chest hair and Y chromosomes sort of way.  We brush his teeth, we read him one of the same four books we read every night then we turn off his light.  Well, he turns out his light when we lift him up the pull the chain.  Every night he asks if he can pull the other chain, every night we say, "No, not that one." He says, "Okay Mommy and Daddy."

After the lights is out we say his bedtime prayer with him.  As soon as "amen" hits he pushes me away to both hug his mom alone and to say, "Daddy, where'd you go?" It was hilarious the first 3-4 times he did it, now I think he is actually trying to get rid of me.  We put him into his big kid bed, Sarah sings to him and he's out for the night.

Either Cooper is going to have a severe case of OCD or his need for normalcy is the same as an adults.  We establish routines for comfort as that is how we work best, play best, and live best.  Maybe, we can all take a page out of Cooperman's book.  What routines do you keep on a regular basis?

Waking with Purpose

I am not a morning person what-so-ever, my morning disdain I believe started when my parents signed my brother and I up for a Saturday morning bowling league when we were 10ish. I liked the bowling, I hated the time frame. My average was around 50, I was the heavy hitter and g od at throwing the ball as hard as could. Anyway, my hatred of the AM continued when I got into high school and water polo practice was before and after school. Six in the morning I had to be speedoed and in the pool swimming my warm up.

It wasn't until recently that I remembered why it was so nice to get up that early.  I started waking up earlier than normal when the time changed and it was getting dark way earlier than it was supposed to.  I needed to get my run in but didn't want to run back roads when it was night time.  So my alarm is set for 6:00 am.  It goes off everyday, as a matter of fact this morning it went off and I didn't want it to, but I was compliant and pulled myself out of bed, I ran four miles, came home and had my quiet time, and took care of Micah Man while Sarah went on a run.

I write this because it wasn't until recently that I understood the difference between waking up early to get some stuff done and waking up with a purpose.

When you wake up to get stuff done there is a process involved, it takes a long time to roll out of bed, a snooze button is usually involved and before you know it you woke up later than you normally do and got nothing done in the morning.

When you wake up with a purpose you go straight to what you are supposed to be doing.  I know if I don't get up and run bright and early I won't work out for the rest of the day, I won't get my quiet time in and I will keep sleeping until Micah wakes me up at 8:15.

I know for me it is incredibly beneficial to wake up with a plan, to move through my day with a plan, when I get home from work I ask Sarah, "What's the plan?"

Waking up with a purpose, with intention, gets your day moving in the right direction, it gets it started and continues it in the correct direction.  I still need coffee, I still get side tracked, and I still want to sleep in but I know I have things to get accomplished.

What purpose do you have for rolling out of bed in the morning?  Self-betterment? Time constraints?  Family time?

Apparently I Hate Toys

Cooper had a great Christmas, he got lots of toys and flashing lights but he rediscovered a toy that won't let me forget it.  I took this video when my sanity was leaving me, I had a headache, I was feeling overwhelmed after the holiday season and then my loving son decided he wanted to play with a toy that loves to repeat itself.

I think toys are as cool as the next Youth Pastor, there is a remote controlled Big Foot that wants me to buy it every time I walk past in Wal Mart.  But some toys just get absolutely ridiculous, with the amount of lights and sounds that get put on them, this fire truck is a great example, but there are a few others I would like to call attention to and more specifically would like to let the toy making companies of know how much I hate the power they hold over me.

1. Wiggle and Giggle Guitar - First off, we don't watch the Wiggles, Cooper is into Leap Frog, Super Why, Handy Manny and Yo Gabba Gabba!  I think that means his profession will be a construction worker who enjoys dancing while reading Shakespeare; what can I say, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.  But I digress, this toy is the bane of my existence, when you press the buttons on some toys they repeat the sound, not this one, this plays the sounds on top of each other.  Which wouldn't be so bad if there were 3 sounds, but it has like 57 different sounds and when they are all playing at the same time sounds like a migraine for Daddy.  I beat this toy once, I took out the batteries and Cooper was still happy with it, however his uncle wanted to be the favorite and put the batteries back in and then taught Cooper how to turn it on.  Thanks Uncle Phil.

2. Sound Puzzles- I was never that into puzzles, it took too much time and concentration for me to finish them, plus you never know if you have all of the pieces until you spend 4 days of your life trying to complete the God forsaken thing only to realize you are missing two pieces.  Oh well, better luck on your next 5,000 piece puzzle of jellybeans and grass.  But my disdain for puzzles escalated when a puzzle that was rejected my my brother and sister-in-law made its way to Grandma and Grandpa's house.  It is a animal sound puzzle made so when you put the piece into the right spot it makes the respective animal sound, sounds cute right?  I am now almost convinced this puzzle is possessed as it meows at it's leisure and moos any time the light gets turned on or off.  It has been banished to the play room but the boy still finds it sometimes and chases me through the house with it.

3. Sticky Hands- This is my wrong doing and I am sorry Mom and Dad, being a parent I see the error of my ways.  Sticky hands are the only good things to come out of the 25 cent machines ever.  The best part about them was there ability to be slung at someone and return right back to you.  I distinctly remember a car ride home from the mall where I dropped 50 cents to get a bigger sticky hand with a real plastic handle.  I was sitting behind my mom in the car and the back of her head became my target for the 15 minute car ride.  I never understood why she got so mad at me until my son played the fireman remix on his fire truck the other night.

Toys can be a great tool in parenting, but are of the bells and whistles really necessary?  My favorite toys growing up were a baseball and a stuffed animal named spike, thank you toy companies for making me sound like an old man.

Any annoying toys that you can recall receiving or getting, if not, I have plenty more I can share.

Clay Pigeons and Resolutions

I hate New Year's resolutions, not because I don't believe they are a great thing, but because I don't want to do something the rest of the world is doing at the exact same time, unless of course that is being involved in the rapture or watching the Giants win their second consecutive World Series.

I know I have things I want to change about myself, lots of them.  Do I want to lose the 10 extra pounds I carry around but no one can see? Yup.

Do I want to follow God more closely? Always.

Do I want to become a better writer? Sure.

Can my husbandry duties and fatherly requirements get a tune up? Of course.

That being said, I don't want to make any resolutions because resolutions are destined to fail harder than Chris Gaines Rock and Roll career, don't know who Chris Gaines is, check wikipedia, it's worth it.

I am not saying if you make a resolution you are going to fail, I know people who are phenomenal at keeping their resolutions people who have lost they weight they have carried around, people who have learned a new instrument or read an incredible book, I am saying making a resolution is like shooting a shotgun with on eye closed.

The other day I went to my buddy's ranch to shoot some clay pigeons and talk before his wife had their baby.  I knew it was going to be th elast time seeing him before the birth of their beautiful baby girl (Caroline May).  As we were shooting he told me to stop closing one of my eyes while shooting the shotgun.  At first I mocked him because everyone who has every watched a western knows if you are shooting a gun you either: a) wear an eye patch (I can't wait to fall in love with you 'True Grit') or b) close your left eye.

He then reminded me that I shoot a gun twice a year and he knows what he is talking about and to listen to him.  So I did, and after I opened both eyes my shooting percentage went way up.  It wasn't that I couldn't see what I was shooting, I just couldn't see it as well and that is the flaw with a resolution, you can see it, just not as well as you should.

This year instead of resolutions I am going to make measurable goals.  Things that I can check my progress on with both eyes, things I can check off a list to keep myself accountable.  I want to have a clay pigeon in my cross-hairs and turn it into dust not miss it completely.

What are you goals for 2011? Don't like goals, thats cool, what about your resolution(s)?

Game Nights

I love to play any type of game, that is just the way my brain works, I think I may have missed my calling as being FAO Schwartz, except I hate the giant piano in the movie "Big" you think it is cool until you try to play it and you sound like every other person who isn't musically inclined or just has short legs.



I love situational games like baseball, I love thinking about what should be done because rarely is a situation the same.  The challenge that being in a new situation after every move is exciting to me.  My love of strategic games started innocently when my Youth Pastor introduced me to Risk.  3 hours later I was wiped off the face of the earth and hooked.  That following summer my dad was worried about me and my friends because we were staying up too late playing Risk.  In hindsight, I don't think he had too much to worry about, I actually just think my friends Jordan, Caleb, Brandon and Schroeder were all incredibly loud even after their people groups had died off.  At one point we recorded an entire game of risk from beginning to end, it may be the single most boring thing that has ever been recorded.

But games are incredible and I have found more and more that there is a type of game that I put higher on a pedestal than any other, they are games of strategy.  Now one would instinctively think that my favorite game has to be Stratego because it's very name is arrived from the word strategy, however, that person would be wrong, Stratego requires as much strategy as Candy Land in comparison to the my favorite game of all time, THE SETTLERS OF CATAN (That is my booming movie preview announcer voice).

You may think that sounds lame, or what is a Catan?  But to you I say stop pondering such silly things and start pondering where you are going to find a Catan board and who you are going to play with.

Games bring a sense challenge, you get the opportunity to be a commander in charge of huge armies or a developer in charge of developing cities.  You get to go head to head with other people to see where you stack up or in the case of Quelf you just get to have fun and don't worry about who wins.

Christmas season and New Years is the time for staying up late and playing board games with friends, whether it be old school like Trivial Pursuit or Pictionary or too new and quirky like Quelf, open the closet, grab a board game and some friends and enjoy a game without the distraction of TV hindering you.

Whats your favorite board game?  Leave a comment and let me know.

26thmas

The day after Christmas was always a lot of fun for us when we were kids.  The excitement had worn off from the day before and we had settled back in and slept of the sugar rush that the food in our stockings had produced.  We were back at home and free to roam around the neighborhood with the 7 other boys our age that lived there.

I call it 26thmas (which is the Christmas Hobbit equivalent of Second Breakfast or Elevensies) because on December 26th we went to all of our neighbors houses and saw what they got for Christmas and played with their toys since we were already bored of ours.  The best 26thmas was when our neighbors got a backyard trampoline and we jumped for hours, it was magical.

The biggest thing that the 26thmas Holiday brought to us was the confirmation that (Santa Spoiler ahead) Santa did not in fact exist and our Moms were in fact the fat bearded man who delivered presents on the night before.  We figured it out by simply getting the cards that Santa had left for us and comparing hand-writing.

Our first thought was to protect Santa saying things like, "He must carry different pens and disguise his hand-writing," or, "He must have his elves prewrite all of the cards and deliver them with our awesome presents."  We may have said this mostly out of terror that if we stopped believing Santa would forever black ball us to the naughty list but the hammer came down when we compared our mom's hand-writing to Santa's and it was an exact match.  We could have continued to fight it, but alas we gave in and Santa was no longer something to believe in.

When did you stop believing in Santa Claus?  Was it devastating or did you already have a hunch?  or tell me about your 26thmas.

Irked is a Funny Word

My chair is broken. And not broken like it needs to repent of it's sins because it feels terrible about the way it treated my desk last week, broken like every time I lean back the hydraulics give out and I slowly lose a solid 10 inches of height at my desk. This may be my bosses way of making sure I don't get too comfortable and lean back while I am supposed to be anxiously pouring over my work, but I think he has better things to do. Things like work on getting approval from the board to get us all iPads and Segways for Christmas (this is totally going to happen* and the best part is that it's all coming straight out of the Children's ministry budget).

*This will never happen, not in a thousand years, even when iPads are featured on VH1's Remember the 2010's and the thought of someone still owning one is considered "retro".

There are a few things in this world that really irk me, things that when they happen I clinch my molars in disgust or passive aggressively make a sarcastic comment at. I began to notice my irkiness at certain things one day when my then roommate would come into my truck and place his things on my dashboard. No big deal, just things on a dash, until I touch the gas pedal at all and they go flying everywhere, particularly in my face and then we get in an accident because he was being all willy nilly with the placement of his things. Regardless, I noticed I had issues, here are some things I have issues with.

1. 15 items or less means just that, unless there is no other line open

Look really mean elderly woman, I don't want to be in this line any more than you do, but there is no other line open right now and my frozen waffles are getting soggy, so if you don't mind I was in front of you and your "sprouts".

2. Biting Ice

I don't bite ice, I would never do such a thing therefore it is out of the realm of possibility, but hearing other people do this is the worst thing anyone could ever do to me. It should be no surprise that I love listening my wife, but she loves chewing on ice and frankly it is the only time I get to cover my ears and say "la la la la la" as loud as I possibly can. One ice chewer in the family no big deal, but now our son is ice chewing as well and if you go to her family's house to have a refreshing beverage you might as well be listening to a man carving an ice sculpture, of people chewing ice.

3. Ambiguity

4. Family Sidewalkers

I get it, you are really cute in your matching turtlenecks, you haven't seen each other in a long time and now you are Christmas shopping for those less fortunate, that is awesome. I love helping the needy and turtlenecks as much as the next guy but just don't line up four wide when you are walking on the sidewalk. Some of us who are way more impatient and thrive on moving quickly need to pass you and save the 15 seconds of our lives you would have wasted.

I know we are supposed to be all happy and jolly this time of year but seriously, we are all friends, what are some things that irk you?