Monday Morning with Coop

About a week ago something happened, I don't know what it was or why it was but someone flipped a switch and Cooper entered into his "terrible twos."  Before I get too much further into this I want you to know I never believed in the terrible twos, I considered them an excuse for parents to use when their kids acted out in stores or in front of extended family, but after this last week I can truly say I am 100 percent on board with this whole terrible twos idea.

This is how it happened, Cooper went to bed one night, and it was normal, it was nice. We laid down and read his San Francisco Giants book as I quizzed him on the different pieces of baseball attire (cleats, batting gloves, hat, jersey, etc. (starting shortstop in 2032 for the Giants)) we said his night time prayer and put him down with his ever growing collection of stuffed animals that are in his crib.  Everything was good, everything was normal.

The next morning he slept in until after I left for work. At about 10:30 I got a phone call from my wife who sounded worn down, on the other end of the phone was a crying baby and a screaming almost 2 year old.  Sarah went on to tell me that Cooper wasn't acting like himself, demanding things saying "no" on a whim when normally he is one of the most obedient children in the world.  This wasn't the precious little innocent boy I have enjoyed for the previous 21 months, this kid was a monster (but a really cute monster, think Mike Wazowski from Monsters Inc.)

It isn't that coop wants to be defiant, he isn't plotting in his crib with Lots-o-Huggin' bear and his stuffed monkey that is wearing a Giants jersey.  Coop is just trying to figure out how to be independent, he is testing his boundaries and with that Mom and Dad's patience.  So last week the Big TO was enlisted for the first time, and no we didn't call in overhyped and underperformed Terrel Owens to discipline our kid, Coop got his first real big kid time out.  He hated it, but not at first.  

I asked him I said, "Cooper, if you keep fussing you are going to have to get a timeout," his response was, "Timeout? Okay Daddy!" Hmmm, in hindsight maybe I didn't make it sound scary enough, like instead I should have called it the "Dragons Pen" or "Mannequin Alley."  Either way it didn't strike much fear into The Coop, until he had to sit there.

I had to hold my son still in timeout for a whole minute because he refused to eat one more bite of his sandwich before he got to have some jell-o.  it took all of my ability not to laugh as my son was melting down because he had to have a bite of his favorite food.

Parenting gets rough, it isn't fun implementing timeout or disciplining your kid at all for that matter, but our oldest is at an age where he knows what is right and wrong and we have to make sure that he is raised in such a way that when he is 35 he isn't collapsing on the floor in a screaming fit because a Barista put whipped cream on his caramel macciato.

Did your kids ever enter into the terrible twos?  How did you deal with it, because i am kind of scared I broke Cooper somehow.

It's a Pooptastrophe

This blog post will have no pictures for reasons that you can figure out on your own, but I will say this, "I touched more poop this morning that doesn't belong to me than any civilized human being should touch... ever."

I uttered those words as I walked out of my house this morning and then realized that any poop whether yours our your children's shouldn't be touched on a regular basis.  I have heard some pretty bad poop stories since I became a parent, as a matter of fact Sarah and I have at least three conversations about poop every day.  It's like when you become a parent you substitute the normal things people talk about like politics and religion for poop and vomit.

The Coop was up around 8 this morning like normal but we give him a little bit of time in his crib before we go get him so he can wake up and get used to having a little bit of down time before the whirlwind of the days starts.  But this day wasn't like other days, when Sarah walked in to get Cooper out of bed she immediately knew something was wrong when she tried to lift him out of bed but he was dried to the sheets, he is actually still sitting there.

Not really, but there was poop everywhere, on his stuffed animals, on the sheets, his clothes, his body and pretty soon on everyone that came withing a 5 block radius of his crib, it was like someone was sniping people with a Coop Poop gun and not even Jack Bauer could escape it.  It was gnarly, and gross, and mom and dad got to clean it up.

Parenting is hard a lot of times, but you know what you do when things are hard?  You do them.  I didn't know how we were going to handle having a newborn and an 18 month old at the same time, but we just did it, we are continuing to do it.  Are there days that you want to put everyone to bed at seven o'clock make a fire and watch a chick flick, yeah, there are, and yes I am a dude.

But you get through those days, those hours, those minutes where you feel like the whole world is about to squish you like a ten year old version of myself with the mosquitoes I caught playing 3rd base in Atwater Little League (Shout out to Von Gooden DDS, 2 tome league champs 12 and under division).  And you move onto the minutes where your son says, "Hi Daddy" when he runs over to give you a hug even though you have been playing with him for the last hour.

Parenting is tough, but you do it, you get through it, and you see the blessings those little pooping children of yours bring.  Any good poop stories?  Let's hear 'em!