Ministry

Tony Robinson once said, "Leadership is learning to disappoint people at a rate that they can handle." The more I am in a leadership role the more I understand this quote. And it isn't so much that I just disappoint people all day, which at times I do, but it is being able to steer ministry in the direction that I see fit after prayerful consideration on my parts and my supporting staffs part. Thats casting vision, thats what a leader does.

And it isn't so much that people are mad at me when I have to disappoint them, it is that I feel like it is harder on me. I am not a fan of people being upset, I am not a fan of being in trouble (ask my mom, I cried when the dog got punished, much less when I did), and I am not a fan of letting people down. If I could I would make it so everyone could do and say exactly what they felt, however, that doesn't mesh with the direction of our ministry.

I once had a man approach me about teaching our High School girls about the importance of not having sex until they were married. I agreed with him that this was an important topic, which is why I have Amanda Silva (Our High School Girls volunteer) teach a bible study based solely on abstinence over the course of the entire summer. I didn't agree with the way in which he wanted to do it, he wanted me to teach from a non-biblical perspective using Tiger Woods as our model of what men are to women outside of wedlock, or in his case inside of wedlock.

First of all, as a Pastor I never want to teach something in the church that is not biblical. That is what I am hired to do, Make God look good and Christ well known to the next generation of students. Secondly, just because there is a pop-culture reference staring us in the face doesn't mean we have to jump on the band wagon and use it is an object lesson. Regardless, I told the man that we had planned to teach a series based on abstinence to our girls (and our guys) but I appreciated his input. He wasn't happy that I turned down his idea, but it didn't fit into what our ministry was trying to accomplish at the time.

Ministry is tough, it's about hard conversations, it's about letting people down, it's about failing but moving forward, it's about encouraging people regularly but regardless of your work they remain stagnant. But we are called to minister to others, we are called to spread the word of God using the gifts and talents he has given us, how cool is that?! I know I am kind of rambling but these were some musing that were on my heart today. As my buddy Ryan would say, Peace and Grace.

Monday Morning with Coop

So yesterday during Coopers nap he pooped, which is fine, babies do that. The bad thing about it was once my child woke up from his nap, he some how finagled out of his diaper, like Harry Houdini from a straight jacket, or me from attending a Miley Cyrus movie. It was amazing, it was smooth, it didn't look like there was any complications. It looked as if he had been doing it for years. He was naked when I walked in, and in "hind sight" (yes that was an intentional pun) it was much easier to clean him up, granted i had to wipe his feet too because he may or may not have been standing in it, but easier none-the-less.

It was actually kind of nice having to go through that, odd I know, but that is one of those stories that you hear Dads recount time and time again, it may be a story a share with his girlfriend later on in life, maybe it will be one that I share with him when his son does the same thing. I don't know, what I do know is that Sarah and I starting to look at big kid beds for our baby boy since he is going to be kicked out of the nursery soon because we will be having a new tenant. But it is crazy to think that I can now begin to reminisce about Cooper when he was a baby. Think about how bad of a sleeper he was, how great of an eater he was (which is why he was a bad sleeper, he was always hungry) how he refused to eat rice cereal for the first month we tried it unless the "Little Einsteins" theme music was on.
Now he is walking, talking, playing drums (he doesn't know if he wants to pursue it as a career or not yet, just as a hobby right now), even weight lifting. People always tell Sarah and I how quickly they grow up, and I know they do, but I just got Cooper figured out, and it seems like every time that happens, he has to go and learn something.

I know freezing time isn't an option so I guess settling for making the most of the stages of life he goes through will have to be sufficient.

Gossip in Disguise

I was at bible study this morning with J, C, and JC (Thats how I introduce my friends, Jordan, Caleb and Jesus Christ) and I know it was a really manly study because the topic of gossip came up. I was thinking though how often we gossip and disguise it as something different, something more socially acceptable, so I came up with a list of ways we gossip to make it seem acceptable to those who want to hear whats going on but love Jesus too much to do so.

5. Prayer Request Gossip. This occurs in small groups or bible studies, usually when half the group is missing due to sleep deprivation from Prom or late night activity that all were a part of the night before. The leader asks for prayer requests and without warning a verbal tornado of hearsay is thrown towards him like the plot of Sex and the City learned how to throw a 99 mph fastball. Do they need prayer for the way they danced last night? Maybe, is it your place to share that? Yes, as long as you are concerned enough for them to share it with God, and the other 4 people in the room.

4. Workplace Gossip. Excuse me, secretary, we need more coffee because Paul drank it all due to the fact that he was up all night gambling at an Indian Casino where he lost his entire life savings playing three card poker with his friend from college and a bald man with a handlebar mustache that attached to his chest hair. Just 1 sugar is fine.

3. Twitter/Facebook. since pictures are worth a thousand words, you don't have to tell anyone about who you saw Andrew kissing. 140 Count 'em.

2. Starbucks Gossip. Most of these are for guys and girls but this one I have seen far too many times as I frequent the corporate monster regularly. 2-8 Ladies gathered, circled, like a pack of ravenous lionesses waiting to pounce on the poor helpless topic of conversation that is about to be thrown into the ring. Sometimes all it takes is a name, followed by an inhaled gasp, some lowly chatter, a head shake, then a head nod, and finally the cackle laugh that is heard after the jugular was punctured. They will even take down their own kind, need to miss your weekly gathering to pick up your kid from dance class? Maybe even be at handbell rehearsal? A funeral? Your funeral? Doesn't matter, they pounce and move on, like a 10 year old on a pogo stick.

1. Venting. This is my game, I know how it's played. You start by saying this, I love this person to death, but... This makes it okay, as long as you love the person you are talking about then it doesn't mater what horrible thing you say about them because you love them. This is the same as saying no offense, but... it is immediately followed by something that is incredibly offensive. This type of gossip is reserved for close friends and family, only those that you love enough to care about and because you care you need to tell someone how much they drive you insane because of their tiny idiosyncrasies that no one notices but you.

What about you? Have you ever been caught in one of these gossip traps? Have you ever been gossiped about through one of these avenues?

Covenant

So in this season of ministry, Spring, I have a tough turnaround from Wednesday to Thursday. Wednesday is usually my longest day of the week, I get to work around 8:30-8:45 and don't get home for the day until around 9 at night. Its doable, I am not exhausted, I usually have enough energy to turn on the American Idol results show and internally mock Simon's v-neck, switch over to SportsCenter to mourn the passing of the Giants talent, and grab a delightful cheddar cheese snack before I turn in for the night.

I wake up about 6 hours later to the two separate alarms I set reminding me that I have students coming to my house in 15 minutes. I need coffee and a bathroom stop or else (1.)I will fall asleep in the middle of my lesson, or (2.)no one will want to sit by me because of the gurgling of my bowels. But enough about bowel gurgling... okay there is no easy segue out of this topic so lets just stop.

My Covenant group students show up at 6:10 and leave at 7:20. They committed to this in-depth bible study in February and are now 2 weeks away from completion and I am ecstatic about these students and their hearts for the Lord.

The weird thing is, going on 6 hours of sleep after my longest work day of the week I tend to be most productive on Thursdays. I have decided it is because I get energized by my core group of students who want to wake up early to experience God in a real way. These are kids who are interested in being transformed by the gospel, they aren't interested in mere knowledge of Christ, they want to experience the life altering ability that accepting Christ has.

It might also have something to do with the amount of coffee I drink in the morning, but I am going to go with the former, because it's a cool thing when you see students rising up to take their place.

(P.S. The Picture is our Covenant Group's Logo, in case you were wondering, or it's Tim Lincecum with a rotary style telephone in his back pocket. Which ever you prefer.)

Competing like the Greeks

Every year I go to a small gathering of men and compete like the original Olympians did (except we have clothes on). We call it Manlympics. Now we aren't going to be competing until later this Fall, but they were on my heart today and so I thought I would give you a glimpse into the amazing men i get to spend 3 days with a year.

Often times fights break out, usually caused by me because soccer shouldn't be included in the competition because it's a game for sissies, plus Matt and I never win. The teams are broken up like so:
Caleb and Lane: The Romans (They are known for their skeet shooting ability as well as being men in general. Regarded as the strongest, physically, of all the teams. They are the champions 2 years running).

Jordan and Ryan: The Huns (Regarded for being the most Patriotic and fastest. They excel in soccer and games of chance. Always regarded as the dark horse of the Manlympics, at least in my eyes. They have come in 2nd place two years running.)

Matt and Peter: The Anglo Saxons (I feel like we are never the front runners for any of the competitions but we are never favored to lose either. Nope, I take that back, we are undefeated in basketball thanks to Matt's time in the hood and my gurth under the basket. We have come in last place every year thus far.)

Also, to prevent a fight from breaking out amongst them concerning who I love the most I am going to go in alphabetical order. The really want me to love them the most, I think I know how Jesus felt when the disciples were arguing over the same thing. Is that blasphemy?

So First off is Caleb. This picture is fitting for him because he tends to be the quarterback of the group. Nothing happens unless Caleb touches the ball first. He tends to be the one who starts the big play and runs like Brett Favre to the end zone to be the first to congratulate you when you finish like a champ. Caleb has been instrumental in helping me see where I miss the mark as a husband to Sarah and where I succeed. I am a better husband because of Caleb's encouragement and insight.


So this is Jordan, he gets the award for longevity in my friendships. Jordan tends to be the peace maker of the group. Which is funny considering he is the one who tends to stir the pot initially. He is the guy who can sell anything to anyone, there are many a times when I have argued with him until he convinced me I agreed with him even when we were on opposite ends of the spectrum. He is responsible for keeping my faith in God hot, times when I wanted to quit, when I was going through the motions he called me back. He is one of the most humble encouragers I know.

Next is Lane, now many of you are thinking right now, wait who is Lane, why haven't you told more stories about him? Lane is a brother of mine for two main reasons, 1. He loves the Lord, 2. He is genuine in everything he does. Because of these two things when Lane and I get the opportunity to talk or hang-out it is a blessed time. This isn't the only picture I have of Lane, but it describes him best because he tends to be a set-up man. He is the guy who helps set-up, clean-up, and is always willing to encourage and laugh. He never has a hidden agenda and is always upfront with criticism and nothing matters more than relationships. He has taught me to make sure that God comes first, people come second, and everything else comes last.

Now I was Matt's best man in his wedding even though He wasn't even one of my ten groomsmen, nope that wasn't a typo, I had ten groomsmen. Matt and I became friends after Sarah and I got married, and it was a long distance relationship where we talked on the phone daily. No, not Sarah and I, Matt and I. Matt is a kindred spirit to me. We tend to see everything eye to eye, and when Matt, his wife Leah, Sarah and I get totgether it tends to be a breath of fresh air. A chance to connect with people who view life as we do, who value what we do, and love the Lord unashemedly. Matt has taught me empathy for those less fortunate and what it means to be passionate for the Lord.

Last is Ryan. I have come to cherish Ryan's relationship with me. This is a man who hungers for scripture and will never stop short of living epically. His first concern is how to love God more and show others how to do the same. Mine and Ryan's relationship has changed in the last year because he became a youth pastor as well, because of this we are a greater encouragement to each other. We know where each other are, we share the frustrations of ministry together, we share the successes of ministry together. Ryan has taught me to hunger for scripture and how important it is to get in my time with the Lord everyday.

These are men that have blessed me in my life, some for a very long time, others our journey together is just beginning, but if it weren't for these five guys I would be deficient in my walk with Christ, in my relationship with my wife, as a father to my son, and as a Pastor to my students. For that, I say, "Huzzah, huzzah, huzzah."

Monday Morning with Coop

When I was young I remember being terrified of pulling out my teeth. Not my permanent teeth (though that is terrifying) but my baby teeth. When they got loose I was so scared it was going to hurt horribly, and there would be blood everywhere, and I would die due to the blood loss when they finally came out. So instead of trying to rip them out via string and door knob, or pay someone on the bus the pull it out (Scott Bergstrom) I would let my tooth dangle there until it fell out painlessly while I was eating spaghetti or playing hopscotch. This is as close as I can come to what I think Cooper is going through.

You see in the last week Cooper has gotten 6 teeth. And while trying to investigate his gums all I could see were beet red spots where his teeth were searching for sunlight. He was upset, kind of mad at the world, and especially at me because I was trying to give him his baby orajel but in order to do that you have to touch the spot that hurts.

I know this is going to sound pastoral, but isn't this the way we treat God a lot in our lives? We have a pain, a pain that is seemingly endless, it hurts, our gums are beet red from it and God wants to take the pain away. He wants to reach in and rub baby orajel all over our sin and our hurt so we can continue living the life He wants us to live and created for us to live, basking in His grace of baby orajel not wallowing in our swollen gums of sin.

Summer Vacation?

Today I began to put together my summer calendar for Pastor Craig, my wife, my students, my sanity, etc. And just looking at my calendar gave me a headache. I have plenty of planned vacation time, the only thing is it is in the midst of madness between the middle of June and July.

Ministry is a weird thing at times, in particular with scheduling. When I am the busiest Sarah is the least busy (Because she is a teacher when students are on break she gets to relax but for me thats when I get a chance to make a nurture connections so I am always running all over the place). Take for example the summertime. We do our mission trip, a fund-raiser two weeks of camp, a VBS, waterslides trip and a Yosemite trip. It may not seem like thats crazy to you, but fit it into a 10 week span and throw family time in, a new baby, 3 vacation rentals (1 that we were given by a Youth's parents which we are incredibly fortunate to have)and things start to get a little hairy.


This is where being an insanely type A personality comes in handy, "What's that Dobby the office elf? I'm not a type A personality? Go back to your home behind the bookcase and wash out my coffee mug!" So this summer I am trying to stay on top of things as well as I can or else my mind might explode and I may accidentally leave Wyatt O'Brien on top of Yosemite Falls.

The Bible is clear about the fruit of the spirit and what it entails and that includes self-control for me, to make sure I am on top of everything, and patience for all of you when I fail horribly. Happy Youthing.

Balloon Animals and Green Mushrooms

I talked to a Youth Pastor friend of mine yesterday, Jeff Bachman, who told me that having kids is like playing a video game, something like Megaman or Halo, or anything in between those two. What happens is you start out on the first level, and you are adjusting to the game, you are learning where the Flying Leaves are hidden and where the secret tunnels are and you eventually beat the boss on the first level, you breath a sigh of relief and then continue on to level two. About 5 seconds into the second level you realize you again are in over your head and that this level is way more difficult than the first, the turtles fly on this level.


But because failure isn't an option, you keep playing(for two reasons, 1. I'm a man and I'm not allowed to, and 2. the levels in this story are metaphors for children... I can't just power off my child when I get frustrated, or throw a Wii remote at him.)
You make the necessary adjustments and you eventually beat level two.

One afternoon player 2 (Your spouse) decides she is going to take level 2 out on a shopping trip with Atari (Her mom, that wasn't an old joke Susan, just a generational one) leaving you to play level 1 all over again. Except this time you have mastered level 2, so level one is seemingly easy, its fun, it's right up there with hop-scotch and balloon animals, it almost seems silly that you once thought this was difficult or frustrating at times.
I know I haven't raised my son yet, the best I have done thus far is teach him that dogs are fun but you shouldn't try to ride them. But I do know that with each proceeding level I am sure it becomes harder and harder to stay engaged in each of your students lives.

I talked to a dad yesterday who was open and honest about the love and concern he has for his kids, he told me that they come and pray with him regularly, that he reads scripture and scripture inspired books with them, and I could tell he genuinely wanted more than anything else for his students to love the Lord.

(<----- Level 2)

Thats where I want my relationship with my kids to be, thats where I want the comfort level of Cooper and I to land, thats where I want my focus to be, on building a relationship with Cooper that points him straight towards the Lord. And that is what my hope would be for all of the parents and guardians involved in our youth ministry as well, that the main focus in raising their children would be showing them the love of Christ and the sacrifice he made for all of us.

I am sure level 2 is harder than level 1, and I don't even want to think about level 3, but regardless of how far into the game we get, we need to remember that passing the level should mean raising up our children to love the Lord, and all others things will fall into place.

Monday Morning with Coop

So I had a lot of people tell me they enjoyed my blog about Cooperman last week so I thought I would indulge again, for two reason, 1. It's my blog and I do what I want (as long as Sarah and Pastor Craig say its okay), and 2. My son is cuter than everyone else's, (and that includes you, parents of the Gerber baby and you Brad and Angelina), so he deserves another post.

First of all, here he is.



Now that you have seen his adorable face (that I just missed being pressed against our sliding glass door) I will now tell you that our baby boy has ear infections, and we aren't talking about his ears kind of hurting or it kind of being infected, we are talking about Sarah pulling a 1/2 inch piece of puss and drainage from his ear, waking up at 3 am crying his little eyes out kind of ear infections.

And I feel rather responsible, as should his Uncle Scott (Big jerk Scotty!!!!!). Scott and I both had this issue when we were little, I would venture to say Scott had it worse sense he couldn't hear well thus prolonging his inability to speak for awhile, but needless to say we both had to get tubes put in our ears and once that was done, we were both fine and dandy. But we are to blame because apparently ear aches are extremely hereditary, like Brown hair, hitch hikers thumb, and whether or not your earlobes are attached to your face or if they dangle freely.

Long story short, I feel like this is the first of many scenarios that I am going to come across where I am directly responsible for the outcome of my child. This stirs a sense of responsibility in my soul where I have come to terms with the fact that the way I live and model my life, in conjunction with the morals and responsibilities I help build into his, are ultimately going to shape the way Coop turns out. Needless to say he can make his own decisions and come to his own conclusions, but ultimately Sarah and I are his primary role-models right now and that is something that is not a joking matter.



Yeah, we make him do laundry.

Nerd Talk

I was giving a student a ride home yesterday after we decided that the greasy exterior of my water bottle was from the person who stocked the aforementioned bottle. If I exchanged the bottle it would only result in my getting greasier, long story short, I drank the water. Anyway he told me that he made a Tauntaun Pokemon card on his iPod touch. (Read that last line again and smell the nerd coming off of it, I can only say its nerdy because I see the same merit my student does in making this Pokemon card.)



Like me you are probably laughing because the sheer thought of a Tauntaun being on a Pokemon card is slightly ridiculous to you considering Tauntauns are indigenous to the planet Hoth... light years away from the Pokemon Universe.


Also at lunch I was chatting with some students and the topics were as follows... Settlers of Catan, Lost, on-line Settlers of Catan, Settlers of Catan iphone app, Risk, how to ask a girl to prom, and sports (this was only when a girl came to talk with us). I have realized that a lot of my conversations with students start out by spouting off nerd lingo that would make Steve Jobs blush (Is he a nerd or a revolutionary?)

Regardless, nerd talk tends to run rampant in our youth house and my assumption is that, like any other way you would relate to students, a key to reaching adolescent boys and relating to them is to engage in this nerd talk, but not go overboard. Know enough about Lost to ask about it but don't have a tattoo of your theoretical Lost timeline on your forearm so you can reference it when someone has a question. Know how to play Guitar Hero but don't beat Through the Fire and Flames on expert. Know what a Tauntaun is but have to look up what planet they are from. Happy Youthing.

P.S. My dad's biggest concern for me when I was in High School is that I was staying up too late at night playing Risk.

Sweatpants Under Denim Shorts

Today I saw a man going for a walk around the beautiful Selma streets with a combo antennae headphone set over his ears, normally I would mock this, however considering I can't listen to the Giants game on my computer or my radio in my office I was slightly envious. But beyond the bright yellow antennaphone this man was also sporting a pair of full length grey sweats with a pair of denim knee-length shorts over the top of the sweats. Now I by no means have the greatest fashion sense in the world, I like to walk the excess length off my jeans rather than hem them (Yeah that was a Jeff Foxworthy quote). But I feel like this man is a walking example of the church way too often.

We want to stay with current trends, we heard that people like to listen to sermons on the go nowadays, so rather than getting a podcast, we sign up for an AM radio station. Now I am all for being in the world but not of it (I don't know how many times I heard this quoted to me in high school) but in order to reach a generation of people who are thirsting for truth wouldn't it make sense to be a part of the media outlets and current trends in which that generation is partaking? At what point did the church decide to get off the fashion train and decide that almost being relevant is good enough?

What are your thoughts on this? Is the church rocking Anchor Blue Beyond Baggy styled jeans? Is that okay?

Monday Morning with Coop

My Monday's are one of my favorite days of the week, yes it helps that it is a day off for me but what set's it apart from Saturdays or Caesar Chavez day is the fact that I get to hang out with my ridiculously cute son Cooper Edwin.



I know, he is disgustingly cute, as a matter of fact it is kind of embarrassing. And I don't love Mondays just because me and Coop hang out, because we hang out at some point every day, it is because it is just Dad and Son, man and boy out to conquer the world, or weeds, or in Coopers case his dog Parker.



Don't get me wrong, we love hanging out with Mom too, she is really cool and good at a lot of stuff. Things like cuddling, playing peek-a-boo, and changing diapers that I may or may not have smelled and ignored. But these days are really special to me because this is where I get to test my merit as a dad and he gets to test his as a son. We make mistakes together, like the time we went jogging and his blanket fell off the stroller and I didn't realize it 'til we were on our way back, we have successes together, like when we had our first monster noise making contest (I won).

But yesterday I realized as Coop and I were watching Lincecum throw 7 shutout innings that these days are rapidly coming to a close. Our Mondays are coming to an end when Sarah is done working in early June. Mom is great to have along and all, but I am sad to see this period of life go. Beyond Mom ending work, Coop and I are going to have another buddy to hang out with too. Come August our days are going to be filled with the sound of Cooper's little brother. I guess I write this with a heavy heart and an eager excitement because I am stoked for my bride to be home with our babies and the Anderson clan is growing yet again in August but my time with my boy is ending soon.

That being said, I may not get a regular day with me and Coop, but when me and my boys get to hang out and test our manhood against that of the outside world, I am going to cherish every minute of it.

Is that contestant on American Idol Christian?

90. Their name is vaguely Biblical, like John or Mark = + 1 point

To add up your score with over a 130 other ideas on this scorecard, visit stuffchristianslike.net.