America, we have an unhealthy obsession.
I like a good reality show as much as the next guy, mostly because I think it's funny how terrible the entertainment industry has gotten at providing quality entertainment. My most recent favorite disaster stars diving, YouTube it, it's terrible.
Our obsession is deeper than stars being too scared to do pencil dives off the high
board though. Our obsession reeks of muddy water and unwashed beards.
Duck Dynasty.
Duck Commander.
Its like staring at an accident on the freeway that you can't see because it is covered in camouflage.
Tonight it returned in all its glory so I thought I'd share my thoughts from the night's show:
Episode 3.1
1. Si was an x-man recruit, his powers are the same as cyclops but he doesn't wine as much.
2. Not showering for 60 days is an accolade.
3. In this home, calling your woman plump pleases her.
4. Beards are for more than decoration, namely; nests and intimidation.
5. Vietnam vets say kick it.
6. Sleeping in a tent v. an RV is the redneck equivalent of "12 Angry Men."
Episode 3.2
1. "His dimples went from his upper cheeks to his lower cheeks." -Jase
2. What is really in Si's iced tea and does he ever wash that cup?
3. Duck Commander is about 3 years late on the shake weight phenomenon.
4. You always have to test trees like you test your dogs.
5. Shorty shorts are required for going to the gym.
It's amazing how a reality show that is so scripted can be so incredibly entertaining. Til next time.
No comments:
Post a Comment